Uh, Please Stand By

To Wed a Wicked Prince

Jane Feather

Simon & Schuster

Now, before you all castigate me for reading yet another crappy romance, let me just say that lately, I've had the attention span of a tsetse fly. Prior to picking up this (uh, is there a nice word for piece of shite?) gem, I had actually started Londonstani by Gautam Malkani. Awesome book, but the idiomatic dialogue (part gangsta, part Brit, part South Asian) makes for slow going and I just don't have the time to get into a good reading groove. I know, I know -- it sounds like I'm rationalizing, right? Well, let's just say that if it takes me over a week to read a trashy romance, we are not in Kansas anymore.

So, back to the book. I'm willing to acknowledge that I was an inattentive reader and that I actually skipped over entire sections of this novel (how many descriptions of well-appointed rooms or riding habits can one person take?) And I probably wasn't in the most generous frame of mind when it came to assessing the plot. Yes, it was shallow -- girl meets boy/prince, prince is involved in a plot to assassinate the tsar of Russia and lies to girl, boy and girl fight about the lies and eventually make up -- but it did exist. I cannot, however, find any excuse that can explicate the sheer wretchedness of the writing. Let's hope that Jane Feather is a pseudonym. Honestly, I wouldn't want to admit to having authored this particular story. In fact, I'm almost embarrassed to admit that I even read it. Minus two prinnys out of five.

A Bleak House

A Thousand Splendid Suns
Khaled Hosseini
Bloomsbury

If I were to ask you list five attributes that characterize the "perfect read", what would they be? I've been spending a lot of time lately thinking about what appeals to me and I've discovered that there are some relatively specific criteria that I apply when deciding whether or not I enjoy a text. While I happily acknowledge that the act of reading is usually a very phenomenological, often personal experience, I thought it might interest some of you to know what's considered a good read by the D-E-S. Here goes:

1. Back to basics. For me, the perfect read usually has a strong plot, interesting subtext(s) and characters that show some kind of "real" growth throughout the course of the novel.
2. Lyrical descriptions. While I can appreciate a stark economy of words, I'm a sucker for a well constructed turn of phrase that invokes my senses and makes me feel the text.
3. An absent author. I HATE literature that is overtly didactic and honestly, I don't really care what the author thinks. Let me piece it together by what the characters say, do, observe -- don't whack me over the head with it.
4. Layers of narration. Books that have stories within stories and multiple narrators almost always grab my interest. I think that why I like Fantasy so much -- the view is always shifting.
5. Another world. When I can close my eyes and see myself in the world that the author describes, that's when I know I'm reading a good book.

In case you were wondering, I decided to do a "top five" this week because Hosseini's book is so amazing that, well, I just can't write about it. It's too intimidating. Set in the streets of Kabul, the novel tells the story of two Afghani women, separated by a generation, who live through their country's incessant turmoil -- from the overthrowing of the monarchy, to the war against the Soviets, to the eventual rule of the Taliban. Part history, part social commentary, part love story, A Thousand Splendid Suns is, in a word, unforgettable. Please read it.

Down by the Bay

The Ladies' Lending Library

Janice Kulyk Keefer

Harper Collins

I'm not sure what any of you are like in terms of your book buying habits, but I always seem to have more novels on my shelves than I could possibly hope to read within a given period. Occasionally, it makes me feel so guilty that I place a temporary ban on the bookstore in an attempt to whittle down the queue. The subject of this week's blog entry had been sitting in the "to be read" pile for months and from the title, I thought it was going to be a bit of a snoozer. Happily I can report that I couldn't have been more wrong!

The Ladies' Lending Library tells the story of a group of immigrant women who spend their summers with their children on the shores of Georgian Bay. During the week, the women supervise the kids, gossip, read trashy romances, and get everything ready for their husbands to join them at their respective cottages on the weekend. Set in the early 60s, the book deals with all sorts of themes -- love, connectedness, assimilation, independence, individuality and passion. In fact, the subtext of this novel -- the tensions between the immigrant and first generation Canadian experience -- is very similar to what was explored in the Lewycka's A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian. Both are perfect candidates for a thinking woman's book club. Three sun-kissed days out of five.

A Girl Named George

The Witch of Portobello

Paulo Coelho

Harper Perennial

So, one of the things that I really like about Paulo Coelho's writing is that he's unashamedly spiritual (please note that in his case, spiritual does not equate to crackpot.) Frequently, I find that his characters uncannily express how I'm feeling about myself and the world at the precise time that I am reading his texts.

The Witch of Portobello is basically a novel about self-definition. The story is told from a number of points of view and Coelho uses an interesting narrative device to relate the main character's story. We never actually hear from Athena directly -- the novel is set up as a series of transcribed interviews where people talk about how she has impacted/changed their lives by observing how she lived her own.

In terms of themes, this is a typical Coelho offering as it examines the ideas of courage, love, joy, passion, self-acceptance and sacrifice. Athena is definitely a Warrior of the Light and like the heroes from The Pilgrimage and The Alchemist, there is a lot that we can learn from being witness to her journey. Three spiritual guides out of five.